What I thought was next, isn't.

Well I don't need to tell you that I'M TIRED! That is a constant so let's talk about something new!
I just spent last Friday in California at a conference for Child Life Interns. The idea was to prepare for everything from interviews and resumes to the national exam for certification. I was really excited to go and desperately needed a night away more than anything. Luckily one of my best friends, Kelly, was able to go with me which helped very, very much! We stayed in some cheap dump of a hotel that allowed me to have the greatest night sleep I have had in a very long time. I don't know if it was just because it was night time or because the room was dark, or what it was but I slept like a baby on the hardest mattress I have ever slept on. I woke up in aches and pains from it but I didn't know the difference when my eyes were closed. After spending all day Friday at UC Irvine Medical Center I became more discouraged than I was going into the conference. I thought it was supposed to give me hope, answer questions, and give me confidence in what I wanted to do. Instead I came out of it with the realization that I may not be able to reach my goal after all. When I complete my current internship I would have to apply for the competitive internship...things I already knew! (but seriously, who has to do an internship before the internship?? Oh well...)What I didn't know is that what "competitive" really means is IMPOSSIBLE! In all the hospitals in the COUNTRY there are only about 50 opportunities for this internship and about 600 applicants. It would require me to move for sure (considering in Arizona there are only 2 spots open for the internship a YEAR!) That really isn't in my financial means but would be really exciting if I could afford to pay my bills here and live in another state for 4 months. More than anything it would be really neat if I could get ACCEPTED in the first place for one of the internships. Which much to my surprise it can take on average 3 years, and that's applying twice a year, to get accepted for one of the positions. As good as the conference was it was highly discouraging. So I came home and have pondered, "What should I do with the rest of my life?" all over again. People are pretty supportive by saying things like, "something will come up!" which doesn't actually help as much because I still have be looking for the "something" in order for it to come up in the first place. Luckily with my degree there are lots of options in the field, I just need to find out what I want to do. So I think that while I try and figure it out I will substitute teach. What do you think? The application process is pretty easy (once I graduate in December) and I don't know how long it will take or how often I will be asked to teach but it can't hurt to have it on hand. Who knows?!?!
I think that if I don't become a Child Life Specialist then I would really like to work for an adoption/foster care agency or run a children's shelter or something like that (you know, the total MONEY makers in human services...that was a joke by the way). But opportunities for that may not be readily available immediately following graduation. I will start applying to different places next month but I think that the substitute teaching will give me something to do that I would really enjoy while I'm searching for my new dream job. At this point, these are all just random thoughts and I may change my mind completely tomorrow but for now, it sounds good.
Anyway, now that I have talked about all the possible jobs I could end up with, I should probably focus on the job that I currently have. Time to check on the girls and see whose baby I hear.