Who in the world is Jessica?

Oh - a year has almost passed!

2010-11-27T23:23:00.000-08:00

GEEZ where does the time go? Here my blog has sat here for almost a year with nothing exciting happening on it at all. Well, that should about sum up the past year! Nothing was happening so nothing was added :-) HAHA...and I'm kidding!
I have spent the past year working and going to school (such has been my life for MANY years now!) and just trying to figure out why I'm here, where I'm going, and how to get there. If you have answers, feel free to share!
This past year, I have spent time trying to make sure that the goals that I put into play actually were accomplished. I am happy to say that for the most part, they have! I have been lucky enough to find myself more financially stable, healthier than I have been in years (lost almost 50 lbs...with many more to go!), made time for reading, friends, and even the challenge of cooking...which I will probably never do again! I moved out of my 324 sq ft house that I lived in for almost 3 years, and even bought a car that has made a difference in my life for reasons I can't even explain! I have put in countless time and effort into my volunteer work at Streetlight and have seen the goals that the team set at the beginning of the year surpass what we thought was even possible. I also wanted to start volunteering on the Foster Care Review Board and was able to go through that process, be approved, and placed on a board (about a 6 month process). I'm thankful that I have the time and availability to contribute to my community and to gain experience that is going to make me more successful in my career. I have been able to purchase the computer I WANT which reduced my stress greatly! I made it a point this year to go back to Utah and see family and friends. Since I missed my 10 year High School Reunion due to a work trip, visiting Utah wasn't just about seeing friends and family I already keep in contact with, but I was able to see friends from school, catch up on their lives and families, and realize how incredibly far we have all come in life. I think it was better than going to the reunion actually so I'm happy it worked out the way it did. I have also been lucky enough to travel to St. George, Utah to support my little sister in the marching band and color guard competition she was in and steal a few extra minutes with her between her practices and performances. I'm so proud of her, she makes me laugh, and I'm thankful that I get the opportunity to continue to see her grow up even though I have spent most of her life in another state. My travels will continue as I go to Colorado next week and to Midland, Texas for Christmas to see more family. When most people put down "travel" as a new year's resolution, they are usually thinking something exciting and exotic but to me, my travel goals were to see family and friends that I haven't seen in a long time. Although there are people that I won't get the opportunity to see, I think that I will put "travel" down for next year also so I make it a point to continue to keep in touch with those I love. I am blessed (although some don't see it that way) that I have the time and freedom to make this a priority!
I still have a few things on my list that I hope to complete before the year is over such as the puzzle that is only partially done in my living room but hasn't been touched in WEEKS or actually applying for my passport. I'm not going anywhere but I want to be ready just incase an opportunity arises. They aren't big goals by any means but ones that I hope to finish before the beginning of the year. And if I don't, I will be thankful for the goals I have accomplished! New Year's is my favorite holiday and my most favorite time of year. Some people just see it as another day but I really use it as a time to evaluate where I have been and where I want to go. My life can get busy and bogged down with a "to do" list the size of China and an email inbox that is longer than that. It is too easy to get lost in those lists and forget to do something for yourself. I am so grateful for the year I have had. For the things I have been able to do. For the control that I feel that I have. For the friendships that I have made. For the small successes and the steps forward. I have also had heartache, breakdowns, tears, fears, and uncertainties. I have had doubt and disappointment. I have faced challenges that I thought I would never be able to overcome. But you have to take the good with the bad!
Sorry it has been so long since I last posted but hopefully this brief description of my life has brought you up to speed :-)

I would rather blog than do homework!

2010-01-25T19:05:00.000-08:00

It's been a long time since a "survey" has been passed around. I stole it from Jody's blog and it seemed to fit the perfect procrastination project I was looking for :-) Enjoy!

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?

Started my Master's program, paid off debt, and lived without regret!

2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

After graduating in Dec 2008 I gave the year 2009 a break of all pressure for resolutions and just did things that made me happy, didn't do things out of obligation, and slept ALOT! I have already set my goals for 2010 and I'm well on my way to accomplishing them. It's going to be a busy year but I'm excited!!

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

YES YES YES! I know so many people that had a baby but no doubt - the arrival of Baby Edward made my world perfect!! Not only did I get to spend 3 weeks with my BFF but I got to spend 3 weeks taking in all the love of her three little boys. I have never waited so anxiously for something and have never been so devastated to have to leave. Check out these handsome little boys on Edward's blessing day.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No. My Grandpa passed away the year before but we waited for his memorial service. It was in Newport Beach, CA on a boat in the ocean - just were he liked to be. It was beautiful!!

5. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?

A better body, a bigger savings account, and more time traveling to see people I love.

6. What countries did you visit?

The US of A!

7. What date from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why:

There were many experiences this year that I won't forget - Santa Barbara for our work "training" will definitely be something that will be remembered FOREVER! It was AWESOME!!

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Truly living the life I wanted to live and doing the things that make me happy. Not to say that there weren't moments of tears, sadness, and stress but really, I think making it through without regret is pretty fabulous!

9. What was your biggest failure?

Not getting into better shape.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Yes - but nothing that left me unable to live so I'm thankful.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

My book collection!! I had either spent countless hours in a Barnes and Nobles or Borders reading books that I loved but couldn't afford to buy because I was SOOOOOOOOOOOO poor or books that I loved but sold to get money for food and gas throughout my very poor college years. Now, without struggle, I have them all on my bookshelf. I bought them all!! Sounds stupid, but for me, it was one of things that I promised myself that I would get back one day and now I have them back.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

I'm sure that there is someone here that I should be recognizing but I can't really think of one - I'll let you know if it changes.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

Probably the same ones that always do - random strangers that clearly appear to be horrible parents. It drives me crazy!!!!!

14. Where did most of your money go?

Taxes?? Haha! Probably to bills as it always does but I was also lucky enough to buy new clothes when I wanted to, an airplane ticket across the country, and to school tuition for the start of my Masters program. It was a great year!

15. What did you get really, really, really get excited about?

My trip to North Carolina and the Santa Barbara trip.

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?

Don't laugh - but probably "This is my now" by Jordan Sparks. It just seemed to be what played at the right time in the right moments.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. Happier or sadder? HAPPIER for sure!

ii. thinner or fatter? THINNER (although NOT by much!)

iii. richer or poorer? RICHER (although NOT by much!)

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Play my clarinet.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Laundry.

20. Did you fall in love in 2009?

You could say that.

21. What was your favorite TV program?
Teen Mom, Days of Our Lives, Grays Anatomy...the list can go on - I LOVE TV.

22. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

Nope.

23. What was the best book you read?

I read so many!! Jodi Picoult came out with "Handle With Care" and she is my favorite author so I guess I will have to say that one.

24. What was your greatest musical discovery?

I didn't make one.

25. What did you want and get?

A job, a bigger tank for Goose, a new TV and the Wii. I got it all!!

26. What was your favorite film of this year?

mmmm...either "He's just not that into you" or "My Sister's Keeper" - I know, I'm a total GIRL!

27. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 28. I remember going to dinner and going shopping for my gift :-) I also got the book I wanted.

28. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

mmmm...winning the lottery...

29. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?

The same as always - as comfortable as possible.

30. What kept you sane?

My friends at work, sleep, and books.

31. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

I always fancy Ellen Degeneres and Pink. If I could combine Ellen's personality and generosity with Pink's body I would pretty damn amazing!

32. What political issue stirred you the most?

The fact that we are still waiting for the "John's Bill" to go through in Arizona. It didn't get passed last year but it is going up again this year. Branded and the community are trying to protect underage girls from being forced into prostitution.

33. Whom did you miss?

Lacy, Dan and the boys - Joyce and Luke - Courtney P - Jessica A - Taylor, Derek, and Steve - and my little sis Bob.

34. Who was the best new person you met?

Tina.

35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009:

Live without regret, don't carry other's guilt, and SLEEP when you are tired!

36. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:

There was a time I packed my dreams away
Living in a shell, hiding from myself

There was a time when I was so afraid
Thought I’d reached the end
Baby that was then
I am made of more than my yesterday’s

This is my now, and I am breathing in the moment
But I look around
I can’t believe the love I see
My fears behind me, gone are the shadows and doubts
That was then, this is my now.

I'm aware it's been awhile!!!

2010-01-03T19:13:00.000-08:00

I know it as been SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO long since I have actually posted but hopefully I can be forgiven. The past couple of months have been crazy busy but super fabulous! I ended 2009 well and am ready for 2010! I cleared out all the old so I am ready for the new and have set my goals. I am already busy and have a packed scheduled through MAY! I can already tell that this year is going to be a good one!!
I hope that everyone had a very Merry Christmas and were able to celebrate the New Year safely. One of my goals is to keep my blog updated (which I have heard lots of people say is one of their goals, but I think it's a good one so I'm using it too) and will try to at least post 2 times a month...unless nothing is going on then it may only be one time a month but I will try to be exciting just for you :-)
I wish everyone a happy and wonderful 2010!!!!

DEAR OL' AF HIGH

2009-10-11T21:37:00.000-07:00

My heart goes out to the American Fork High School Marching Band and Color Guard tonight. Last night after an incredible competition and a "clean sweep" for 1st place they were faced with a tragedy on their way home. A bus driver passed out and lost control of a bus leaving one of the teacher's to try and take control. Although her actions may have saved the lives of many students, her life was lost in the accident. There were several injured and many taken to the hospital for precautions but most are home safe.
After each competition the band circles together and sings "Friends". I remember it being part of the tradition and meaning so much to me. Tonight, this is dedicated to the band, color guard, and most of all, Heather. Although there is so much work that goes into being a member of that marching band and at times the last thing I ever wanted to hear was the voice of one of the instructors telling us to keep going or to do it "just one more time" I also never felt so much love, compassion, and heart from our instructors, director, and even our band mom and dads. Although this isn't my direct loss, I feel so deeply for everyone there. Please know you are in so many people's thoughts and prayers.

Packing up the dreams God planted
In the fertile soil of you
I can't believe the hopes He's granted
Means a chapter of your life is through

But we'll keep you close as always
It won't even seem you've gone
'Cause our hearts in big and small ways
Will keep the love that keeps us strong

And friends are friends forever
If the Lord's the Lord of them
And a friend will not say never
'Cause the welcome will not end
Though it's hard to let you go
In the Father's hands we know
That a lifetime's not too long
To live as friends

And with the faith and love God's given
Springing from the hope we know
We will pray the joy you live in
Is the strength that now you show

We'll keep you close as always
It won't even seem you've gone
'Cause our hearts in big and small ways
Will keep the love that keeps us strong

And friends are friends forever
If the Lord's the Lord of them
And a friend will not say never
'Cause the welcome will not end
Though it's hard to let you go
In the Father's hands we know
That a lifetime's not too long
To live as friends

And friends are friends forever
If the Lord's the Lord of them
And a friend will not say never
'Cause the welcome will not end
Though it's hard to let you go
In the Father's hands we know
That a lifetime's not too long
To live as friends

To live as friends

Though it's hard to let you go
In the Father's hands we know
That a lifetime's not too long
To live as friends

No a lifetime's not too long
To live as friends

Time for school again!!

2009-08-29T00:08:00.001-07:00

I have VERY MUCH enjoyed the past 8 months without school. I have loved the time, the sleep, the normal schedule, the ability to do what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it, it has been FABULOUS! I have been able to get involved the the groups that I volunteer for, spend time with friends, stay up late, sleep in, work normal hours, and read for fun!! It has been WONDERFUL!! I thought I would wait until January to begin a master's program but I guess I just couldn't wait that long. I applied and have been accepted into a master's program at National University in La Jolla, California. I am going to be getting my degree in Public Admin in Non Profit studies and can't wait!! I'm nervous to begin and the flashbacks of the insanity have come full force, but I can't wait forever! In order to run a non-profit, I have to have it - the sooner, the better. Depending on how long it takes me to do my thesis I can be done in as little as 14 months but we shall see if I can do it. I would love to be done by December 2010. Wish me luck!!

Anyone up for a celebration in Cali when I'm done???

INNOCENCE SOLD

2009-07-10T00:54:00.000-07:00

He put her out on the street tonight
Too scared and trained to even fight
He forces her to be raped for a price
She’s so confused, this Pimp appeared nice

He stripped her of her hopes and dreams
Thought he could exchange it for a new pair of jeans
At 13 she was trying to find her own niche
But now can only hope to become his Bottom Bitch

She is tortured and raped, no sense of control
Her innocent life is no longer whole
She needs a place to run and hide
Somewhere to fix what’s been broken inside

With nowhere to go she stays where she’s at
With a master manipulator who beats her with a bat
She’s told she deserves it; he reminds her she’s his
A piece of property on his “for sale” list

This doesn’t happen far from here
It’s not a foreign country’s issue to bear
Even if you close your eyes
The innocence of this little girl still dies

Since you’re home and safe tonight
Please kneel down and pray that she’ll be alright
For tomorrow she’ll be back on the street
Sold to a stranger, a price they will meet

By Jessica Blanco
Visit: brandedphx.com

9 YEARS IN THE MAKING!

2009-06-13T23:41:00.001-07:00

I have now lived in Arizona for NINE years!! Can you believe it? I can't! The drive down here was the first of many adventures - none of which I could have imagined when I left Utah. I thought growing up was a challenge in a world that I didn't understand but then I learned that growing up didn't happen until after 18 years old and that the world that I didn't understand only expanded. I was lucky to leave home with some of my best friends with me. Taylor and Derek moved here with me and I couldn't have done it without them. They made it easy! They made it hard when they decided to move back to Utah and I had to decide if I was going with them, or if I was staying behind - OBVIOUSLY, I stayed behind. I had many moments questioning my decision but it was the right one. I still miss having them here!!
I can't believe what the past years have brought me. I have never been happier, more sad, more scared, more satisfied, more achieved, more devastated, more everything!
I'm so thankful that I made the choice to move here after high school. I can't imagine my life any other way!

Take a walk down MY memory lane!
(Pictures are in no paticular order - just how the downloaded - but they are some of my most favoritest moments)

Arizona maybe a desert but it's a beautiful one! I found a spot that has brought me peace and serenity. I used to come to this spot and read, pray, cry, and even a time or two it has provided me a very nice sleepful rest. I have celebrated life here. I have cried about life here. It's a very special spot!

Call me an old lady but one of my favorite things to do here is go to the casino and play BINGO! And thanks to Joyce - we survived a small moment of unemployment by winning BINGO! (I don't recommend gambling of any kind when you don't have a job - we were just lucky - not responsible!)

These are MY boys!! I will love them more than any other woman can ever possibly love them. I will always owe it to them for being my guiding light when I wanted and needed to leave Utah. Without Taylor, Derek, and Steve, I don't know where I would be!

For the years that I worked at the massage school these moments were my favorite! We used to hold our own therapy sessions at IHOP where we solved the world's problems, predicted the future, talked each other out of bad ideas, gave each other hope and love and enough umph to go back to work the next day! We also owe these times to Big John who was our server at IHOP every time and was our sounding board when we needed one.

True friends! Courtney and Joyce have made me laugh until I have cried, and have made laugh when I have been crying. They help me survive! Courtney started out as my instructor at massage school, my boss when I worked there, a dear friend as time went on, a roommate a little bit later, and a best friend after that. People wonder how I survived living with her - I wonder how I would have survived without living with her! Joyce and I were just destined to be friends. We understand each other when no one else does, we don't need to make excuses for who we are, and she has been one of my biggest life supporters in everything that I have done and do. She gets me. What would I do without them??

This is my turtle, Goose. He is now 2 years old. He has a personality all his own but I love him!

OH MY LACY! I can't imagine my life without her! I met her when she was my boss at the massage school - little did I know that she was going to be my best friend! People say that no matter where you live you find new friends that "you can't imagine your life without" - but really, I was brought here so I could have Lacy. JLCC can't be done without her!

If you can't tell by the picture - we are studying! Kelly is the only reason I made it through my bachelors degree. She wouldn't let me quit even when I wanted to. Proof once again that I wouldn't have been able to survive anywhere else! Kelly was here, so I had to be.

Carla and Rachael were able to come and visit me last year. We had SOOOO much fun! Even though we all live in different places in the country, we are lucky enough to have had this time together!

GRADUATION! Need I say more??

Getting Geared up for Branded Ride

2009-05-13T20:00:00.001-07:00

As most of you know I'm involved with a group called 'branded' (visit: www.brandedphx.com) and on Saturday we are having our FIRST annual motorcycle ride. We are working to stop child prostitution right here in Phoenix and are partnering with other cities in the country who are trying to combat the same problem. I could leave you all the stories, statistics, quotes, etc right here but then you would go visit our site so please, please, please go check it out! We don't know how many people we are going to have on Saturday but we are praying for LOTS! The money is so needed right now. It is used to feed, clothe, rehabilitate, and rescue these underage children who have been FORCED into prostitution. People think that those who are doing the unthinkable, the inhumane, are doing it because they want to, because they don't WANT to get out, and it's not true. The average age of entry into forced prostitution is 13 years old...THIRTEEN. We need to help, we need to rescue, we need to educate, we need to make it STOP! Go to the website to read more or feel free to ask me questions! The more we know the more we can help!
PLEASE VISIT BRANDEDPHX.COM
Pray for the vice squads that are trying to protect. Pray for the girls that are out on the street tonight. Pray that those who know about the ride on Saturday will come and that they will spread the word so we can raise money and awareness.
THANK YOU!

A DAY AT WORK

2009-03-27T14:48:00.001-07:00

I am LOVING my new job for many, many reasons but one of the main ones is that it is so much fun! The people who I work with are so great and there is always something to laugh about and something to do...and they do it BIG!
So we had a Spring Fling today and it was a BLAST! I can't wait till we get the pictures so I can actually put them on here but for now I will tell you that our owner gave away $20,000 today during our activities and I won $1000...NOT bad!! We had two contests that were worth a prize of $2000 each. One of them we had to decorate 12 eggs and the best set own. Then we had a contest of the best hat (I only did the eggs but the hats were really really cool!) The people at work talked and talked about this festival and they had secrets about their projects and teams and it went on and on. I decided to join the competition and see what happens...here are pictures of my project.

And believe it or not...I WON 2nd PLACE! I was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO excited! I couldn't even believe it! In addition to winning 2nd place in the egg contest my team won 2/4 of the games that we played. It was so awesome!!

Our owner is an incredibly generous person who cares greatly about us. I'm very lucky to have been given an opportunity to work in this environment.

Now...we are getting geared up for our SUMMER EXTRAVAGANZA in Santa Barbara California!!

NO DAY BUT TODAY...

2009-03-20T21:07:00.001-07:00

I WENT TO RENT!!!! Oh how I love this musical. My boyfriend surprised me with tickets a couple of days ago and it MADE MY DAY! I hold Rent very near and dear to my heart for many, many reasons so I just about cried when I found out I really could go.
I learned and knew this soundtrack by heart before I ever saw the play. I listened to it, I learned it, I read about it, and I waited for the opportunity to see it. The excitement that I had when I first saw it was the same that I had this time, if not more...and I've now seen it 4 times on stage and it only gets better! I don't know if the understanding of it is more clear, the meaning is more personal, or if it just really gets better, but no matter what, it is worth it every single time I have seen it.
We bought the DVD of their final performance on Broadway so we don't have to just watch the movie, we can watch the production. I was VERY excited!! I'm sad that this is their final tour...although we all know that it will return...I will be there again.

'

This play alone is amazing and is created in the eyes of an incredible man who never made it to see his own production. I have copied the history of Rent from their official website: siteforrent.com and hope that you take the time to read it. This play is truly about life, death, and the experiences in between that we ALL can relate to. I don't care if you were never homeless, you understand the feeling of not knowing where to go next. I don't care if you don't have AIDS, you understand the fear of illness and you have experienced the sadness of losing one you love. You have fallen in love and it has walked away from you. You have friends who you wouldn't have been able to survive without who are still there when you need them no matter what. Experiences don't have to be exact for you to appreciate someone else's life and to be able to relate to their feelings of sadness and hope.
This is Life brought to Life.

"The evolution of Rent is not a simple one. It took seven long and difficult years to take the show from its initial concept to its first public performance. The story of Rent is filled with highs and lows of the most epic proportions. For every burst of applause and prestigious award, there is the reminder that its creator is not here to share in its glory. In fact, it was only one week before Rent's first preview that Jonathan Larson felt the first thump of the aortic aneurysm that would take him away. Director Michael Greif and the cast were rehearsing "What You Own" - the rousing second act show-stopper about dying at the end of the millennium - when Jonathan collapsed and asked for an ambulance. He later told friends that he couldn't believe that the last burst of music he would hear might be his own song about dying.

An ambulance took Jonathan to the hospital, and he was diagnosed with food poisoning. A few days later, after another incident, doctors at a second hospital said he had the flu. On January 25, 1996, Jonathan - weary but excited - went to the final dress rehearsal of Rent at New York Theatre Workshop. By the end of the show, Jonathan was surrounded by friends and supporters shouting in approval and stamping their feet. After the ovations subsided, he was interviewed by a reporter from The New York Times. The reporter told Jonathan off the record that Rent was an amazing achievement, destined for success. Then he went home, put on some tea, and died. His roommate found him on the floor of the kitchen, beside his coat. Jonathan Larson was 35 years old.

You know what happened to the play next - the show has become one of the biggest things ever on Broadway. It's become the sort of thing a playwright dreams about in the middle of the night, and in the morning is embarrassed at how wild he's let his fantasies run. Rent - Jon's first produced show - is like an athlete who has won the Rookie of the year award, an Olympic gold medal, the World Series, and the Most Valuable Player Award, all in the same season. It has collected the New York Drama Critics Circle Award, the Drama Desk Award, The Obie Award, the Tony Award, and the Pulitzer Prize. Rent was on the cover of Newsweek. Time called it a "breakthrough," The New York Times "an exhilarating landmark." At the 1996 Democratic National Convention, the cast of Rent sang "Seasons of Love." Movie and television stars have returned again and again, and afterwards, at the Nederlander Theater, they've gone backstage to sign a long brick wall - Mel Gibson and Janet Jackson and Jodie Foster --forwarding their best wishes and congratulations to Jonathan and the cast. People in the show say they recognize the same audience members coming back to the Nederlander ten, fifteen times. Over the past few years, Rent has played to cheering fans throughout North America. In fact, it has become a global phenomenon, packing houses in England, Japan, Australia, Germany and countless other countries. If a young playwright told you this was a fantasy of his, you'd smile at his ambition, and he'd walk away embarrassed. But here it is true.

There would be no Rent, of course, without Jonathan Larson. However, there are other voices too, artists and producers and actors who helped shape Rent and gave it sets and lights, flesh and bones. If you've ever wanted the inside scoop on Rent, you've come to the right site. Here's how it happened:

In the beginning, there was Billy Aronson, a Yale trained playwright who loved opera and had an idea: Billy wanted to write a musical updating of La Boheme. He wanted the show to be about people like himself - struggling to make art under lousy conditions. Some theatrical acquaintances suggested he work with Jonathan. In 1989, they met and swapped ideas. Jon came up with the title: Rent. He didn't like Billy's proposed Upper West Side setting; Jon lived a bohemian life downtown. He rented a scruffy loft that had a bathtub in the kitchen. For a while, he and his roommates kept an illegal, wood-burning stove. He dated a dancer for four years who sometimes left him for other men and finally left him for another woman. Jon wanted to write about his experience. In 1991, he called Billy and asked if he could make Rent his own, and Billy agreed.

New York Theatre Workshop put on a reading of Rent in the spring of 1993. Some thought it was simply ragged, but others were in love with the material, no matter its flaws. A young producer named Jeffrey Seller, who had met Jonathan several years earlier, felt the time was right to produce a musical. He had stayed in touch with Jon, because he was convinced that one day, "Jon was going to write a brilliant musical." When Jeffrey first saw the show, he felt the play was baggy, a collage with no narrative shape. "There were great songs," Jeffery remembers, "but there were endless songs." Jeffrey was still interested - as long as Jon found a story as compelling as the music.

Jon sent a letter to Stephen Sondheim, his mentor, asking for advice and assistance. The older composer responded by encouraging Jonathan to apply for a Richard Rodgers foundation grant. Jonathan eventually won $45,000 to support a workshop production of Rent.

What they needed now was a director. Jim Nicola, artistic director of the New York Theatre Workshop, immediately suggested Michael Greif, a young New York director who had recently become artistic director of the La Jolla Playhouse in San Diego. Greif listened to a tape of Rent on a Walkman flying from California to New York. The script seemed shaggy. "What impressed me," he remembers, "was its youth and enthusiasm, and that it was a musical about contemporary life. Jon was writing about some people I felt I knew, that I sort of loved, or had loved in my life." What Jim wanted in a director was a counterweight to Jon's eternally positive outlook, which had allowed him to treat dark subjects like AIDS, homelessness, and drug addiction with optimism. Michael was hard-nosed and cool-headed. He met with Jim and Jonathan in January of 1994, and the three set to work on bringing the script to the level of the music. "It was very fragile material at the time," Jim recalls. "And it was so easy for it to become sentimental or hokey. I felt Michael had the right sort of dryness and sharpness to balance Jonathan's writing."

Jim saw that his instincts were right when the three got down to shaping the script in Jon's loft. They met for a week in the middle of the spring, preparing for the workshop scheduled for November. They went over the script scene by scene, moment by moment. Immediately, the dynamic between Jonathan and Michael slipped into a productive yin and yang. Michael was afraid there was something self-congratulatory about the young bohemian heroes of the show; so Jon toned down the lyrics of "La Vie Bohème." Michael fretted about the homeless characters - that they not simply serve as East Village window dressing, as moral scarecrows where Mark and Roger could drape their good social conscience; so Jonathan wrote the new song, "On the Street," where a homeless woman gives Mark a stern telling off. Most importantly, Michael had reservations about the message of the show, the "No Day But Today" cheerfulness of the life support meetings. Michael had friends with HIV, just as Jon did, and they were not cheerful about it. Jon added the scene of Gordon questioning the life support credo, saying he regretted his low T-cell count. And Jon himself kept Michael from becoming too hard-nosed and cool-headed. Anthony Rapp, who originated the role of Mark, remembers, "what Jon gave Michael was some of his hope and heart and generosity of spirit. And what I think Michael gave Jon was some edge and realism and complexity, and making sure things didn't all resolve nicely and prettily. It was a good marriage."

That summer, Michael and Jon talked plot. One large problem, they agreed was the relationship between Maureen and Mark; in these drafts, a major plot point was Mark winning Maureen back. Michael didn't like it. "My position was, if they're gonna be lesbians, let them be lesbians. Don't make them about going-back-to-their-man." In October, Michael worked out the "performance vocabulary" of Rent. For budgetary reasons - and also because it suited the nature of the characters - the NYTW decided to have minimal props. Michael suggested the three "Frankenstein" tables, which could be used to serve multiple functions in the show. He pushed for a multiracial cast. Because it was rock, Michael played around with microphones, with actors singing directly to the seats: "We were very anxious to take advantage of the fact that it would be as much a concert as it was a play."

For all of its flaws, the November workshop was a tremendous success. It ran two weeks with the audience growing larger and more enthusiastic each night; by the last week it was sold out. Anthony Rapp, remembers the excitement: "I kept telling people it was going to be an event. We knew it needed work. But people I trust and respect - friends and collaborators - would come down and be knocked out by it.

Jim Nicola thought it needed work, too. But the responses he was getting from his friends were just what Anthony was hearing. "There was a lot of passion - again, the most striking thing was the intensity of opinion about it. There was a large segment of people whose tastes I trusted who just loved it, and didn't care what the problems were. I felt even more convinced that there was really something strong here." Jim found himself moving towards an exciting, scary, stirring decision: "Rent was the kind of show to bet the company on."

During the workshop's second week, Jeffrey Seller returned to East Fourth Street. This time, he brought his business partner, Kevin McCollum. Sitting down in the front row, seeing the three tables, remembering the plotless show he'd seen a year earlier, Jeffrey had time for a crisis of confidence. He turned to Kevin before the show and warned him, "this is either gonna be absolutely brilliant or it's going to be a mess." At intermission, Kevin nudged Jeffrey and said, "I'm loving this. Get out the checkbook."

A few nights later, they brought a business associate named Allan S. Gordon to the NYTW. The three had worked together previously on the national tour of "The Real Live Brady Bunch." Allan was equally enthusiastic - like Jeffrey and Kevin, he was overpowered by the music. That night, the three decided to join forces with New York Theater Workshop to bring the show to fruition.

After the holidays, Jim, Michael and Jonathan sat down again in Jim's office. Jim had thought it over, and talked to NYTW's board members. The Workshop decided to stage a full production of Rent the following year with the help of Seller, McCollum and Gordon, who would get the commercial rights in return. The budget would be $250,000 - twice the cost of anything NYTW had ever mounted.

They spoke about what needed fixing. The show had no single story, no primary narrator - in the November workshop, all the characters told the story; when they had something to say, they turned around and said it right to the audience. And the characters themselves, especially Maureen and Joanne, needed refinement. Jim gave Jon a task: Could he boil the plot down to a single sentence? The sentences Jon first turned in were impossibly long, crammed full of clauses, parentheses and second thoughts. But as Jim anticipated, as the sentences came into focus, so did the play.

Jim decided to hire a dramaturg to work with Jonathan. Dramaturgs work with playwrights as critics, advisers and editors. Jon did a lot of interviews before meeting Lynn Thompson. Lynn seemed to be on Jon's wavelength, and they hit it off right away. She was able to speak in a voice that sparked Jon's enthusiasm. Jim put the two on a schedule; Jon would deliver a revised draft by summer's end. Rent was to begin rehearsals in the fall.

Jon had found another strong collaborator. Lynn suggested he work up biographies of the characters, that he write a version of Rent told through each person's eyes. Her belief was that once Jon understood the story completely, once he really had the characters under his belt, the rewriting of the play would come in a simple burst. They worked through the summer, discovering a structure for Rent.

By October Jon had a new draft; he was confident his six years of work were over. Actors read the script aloud to everyone. Jim and Michael were pleased with many of the changes, but they knew they weren't out of the woods. The characters were sharper, but Jon had done some structural fiddling, turning much of the show into flashback. The first act began with Angel's funeral and Mark wondering, "How did we get here?," with the rest of the story catching up from there. No one was comfortable with this except the playwright himself. The Maureen-Joanne relationship was finally working, but their second act duet was by all accounts miserable. "One of the worst songs ever written," Michael remembers with a laugh. "The song was a straight out cat fight, the lovers sniping at each other, Maureen telling Joanne, 'You're the hepatitis in my clam.'"

Jeffrey was also concerned. The show was supposed to go into rehearsals in six weeks and Rent didn't feel ready to him. "On the one hand, the new script made a huge, wonderful leap from the workshop - a gigantic creative stride - but it wasn't there yet. Now it's late October and we're in casting. And the show starts rehearsing in December." Jeffrey dashed off some quick, blunt notes on what he felt needed to be changed in Rent before the production could move ahead.

Jeffrey's notes were intended for Jim and Michael, but somehow Jon got a hold of them. What the notes called for was another rewrite. Jon didn't want to do any more writing. "There was real terror the production wouldn't happen," Michael remembers. "It was a tense few days. Jon was very upset and very frustrated. But we all wanted this show to be as strong as it could be." Jon turned to Sondheim one last time, and Sondheim reminded him of a key proposition: theater is collaborative. Part of Jon's job was to take into account what his collaborators felt. So Jon signed on.

Michael wanted a simplified structure, with a clearer emotional division between the two acts: "The first act should be much more the celebration, and the second act should reflect the ramifications and sorrows surrounding these lives." Jon finally quit his job at the Moondance Diner. His friend Eddie Rosenstein remembers, "After he left the diner, and he announced that he was a full-time professional musical playwright, his spirits soared. That's all anybody wants to do in life, isn't it? A chance to do what they do."

During Jon's rewrites the show moved into casting. Michael wanted a youthful, sexy cast. He and Jon leaned toward young performers who seemed to have some connection with their characters, whose spirit could add dimensions to the work. The cast seemed to invigorate Jon. "He was really inspired by this company," Michael says. "We still needed the Joanne-Maureen song. And Jon really wisely said, 'let me just sit with these actors, and let me bring you something.' And then what he brings me is 'Take Me or Leave Me,' and I'm totally thrilled out of my mind."

In December, with casting done and rehearsals about to begin, Jon handed in the final version of Rent. Jon had worked a succession of 20 hour days. "He had completely cleaned up the narrative," Jeffrey says, remembering everyone's excitement with the last creative step. And Jon finally delivered to Jim his one-sentence summary of what story Rent told: "Rent is about a community celebrating life, in the face of death and AIDS, at the turn of the century."

From December on, it was a quick sprint to the show you've seen. There were a lot of what Jon called "programming changes": shifting songs from one position to another, seeing where they fit best. In January, Jim watched a rehearsal with a group of NYTW board members, and the emotional response to RENT was extraordinary. "It continued to get even tighter and better through rehearsals," Daphne Rubin-Vega, the original Mimi, remembers. The New York Times got wind that a rock musical based on La Bohème was going to premiere on the 100th anniversary of the original La Bohème. No one had known this; it was a fluke. The night of the final dress rehearsal, Jon was sick with a sore chest and a fever. Still, he took a taxi to Fourth Street, watched the show, and sat for his interview with the Times. The last thing Michael and Jim remember saying to him was to take it easy and sleep well. Jon died an hour later.

After Jon's death, there were a few revisions. Lynn, Jim and Michael and musical director/arranger Tim Weil (who would take charge of the show's musical elements after Jonathan died) would meet and attempt to decide what changes Jonathan would have approved. When the show premiered, they knew they had something special on their hands. Jon's death added an explosive, powerful element to the cast's understanding of the play. "The company had already come together so well, but the event of Jon dying just brought us together that much more strongly," Daphne remembers. "It let us remember that the bottom line is really about what you do with this experience, because tomorrow isn't promised you. There was no more powerful way of receiving that message than from someone who was completely healthy and died. Someone whose life was just beginning"

The day of Jon's death, no one at the Workshop was quite sure what to do. The first performance was scheduled for that evening. Jim Nicola's first inclination was to cancel, but he knew they needed to do something for Jonathan's memory. The first act, in particular, involved a lot of tricky dancing and jumping on tables. It hadn't been completely rehearsed, and he was afraid there would be injuries. That evening, New York Theatre workshop was filled to capacity with people Jon had loved - friends, family and colleagues. Jim decided on a sing-through - no movement, just songs. Throughout the first act, the cast was able to hold their seats. But very slowly, they began to rise. They acted, they danced. "It was incredible and terrible," Anthony remembers. "It was like we had to do it. We were all sobbing and crying." The lighting people made their way to the lighting booth; the sound manager began to pick up his cues. "They couldn't contain themselves," Eddie remembers.

"The audience was reaching out to the cast. They were crying and cheering. By the second act, it was no longer contained. It was the full show run full-out. If emotion could have become a physical force, the roof would have blown off, the weather would have changed." The second act ended. There was a huge ovation, the cast slowly left the stage, and the audience stayed in the theater. No one was sure what to do. The cast returned and sat down in the front row. Finally, a single voice called from the audience, "Thank you, Jonathan Larson," which brought the evening's loudest, final burst of applause.

Drag Races!

2009-03-07T20:10:00.000-08:00

A couple of weeks ago David and I went to the NHRA Drag Races here in Phoenix at Firebird Raceway. I have watched racing of all sorts on TV with David and I was really excited to be able to go and watch it. It was LOUD but we had ear plugs so it wasn't too bad. Some of these cars are going HUNDREDS of miles an hour. They are only on the track for seconds and then they are done. It's crazy!

It took me a few tries to be able to capture some of the pics because they were going so fast but I wanted to try and get a pic as they flew down the drag strip. There was only one time that I thought I was going to die. We had walked around between the races and went to the Force Team trailer to see the car as they fixed it up for the final race. They run on nitromethane which should NOT be inhaled...but I was standing at the back of the car as they were testing this and very quickly weren't able to breath and needed to run for cover. Unfortunately so did everyone else and it almost turned into a panicked exit. I felt like I was suffocating!! It was horrible!!! It is funny now but it was NOT at the time. I had a great time overall though. Who knew I would ever be watching or understanding racing!

Back from Vegas!

2009-02-10T10:30:00.000-08:00

I've been back for almost a week so forgive me for the delay...

I spent last weekend in Vegas with my boyfriend, David. He is there for two weeks on business so I was able to fly in for the weekend. We had such a great time! It was so nice to have time to relax and have fun and have moments of forgetting the stress and worries that have recently taken over my life.
I flew in on Thursday night and met up with some of his co-workers at one of the bars in the hotel who were doing Karaoke. No one from the group actually got up to sing but we sure tried to get David to sing "Ice Ice Baby". He knows every word and it's so funny. One of his coworkers wrote his name down on the piece of paper but no one was willing to take it up so I gladly offered! Unfortunately it was too late in the night and they never got to his name. Oh well, it was fun anyway. The DJ was crazy although I have never met a karaoke DJ that wasn't. The whole evening was really entertaining and I really enjoyed meeting the people who I hear so much about from his work. Hopefully I made a good impression :-)
On Friday morning David had to go to work for a couple of hours so I slept (in the greatest King Size bed ever!) and ordered room service, read the news paper, and watched some TV. He came back earlier than I was expecting so I wasn't actually ready for the day but that quickly changed. I was able to take a shower with hot water that lasted the ENTIRE shower. I have a very tiny shower at home and a very tiny water heater so I have learned to quickly get in and get out. The fact that I could take my time was wonderful! We went straight to the casino (not that it can be avoided if we tried) and played a couple of games. Luck was not on our side at the slots or on the Craps table so we headed to the strip and didn't make it very far. We went to Caesar's Palace to all the shops and then went over to the Mirage. This was my favorite!!!! We walked around for a while, had a drink, went to lunch to at their Craving's Buffet and then off to the Secret Garden. I LOVED Secret Garden! LOVED IT LOVED IT LOVED IT! It started to rain but I didn't care. They had dolphins, leopards, lions, panthers, and even Llama's.

We had perfect timing at each exhibit. We couldn't have planned it better if we tried. The trainers were feeding and playing with the dolphins as we got there and as we moved pools so did the trainers to feed and play. It started to rain a bit harder so we decided to go to the underground exhibit where you can view the dolphins in the water. That was so fun! They are so humanistic and it was fun to watch them play. There was a mommy and baby who seemed to be having so much fun just swimming around and doing tricks while another girl and boy dolphin were having their own kind of fun ;-) We got the discovery channel edition!

Even though it was still raining we went to the other animal exhibits. There was a new baby leopard there and I started to get a little sad since the exhibit had a sign that said, "Java is not here right now. Come back later!" But just as I finished reading it, the baby and vet appeared in the little play room. I don't remember how old the baby was but it was only the size of a "house cat" and was so fun to watch him play. I'm happy that the timing worked out just perfect because after seeing the baby we went to look at the other animals. By the time we made it back to the play room area for the baby he was tired and sleeping. I'm glad we were able to see him before he got tired.

After we finished at the Mirage it was time to head back to the hotel to meet up with another couple. One of David's friends from work also had his girlfriend come into town so we were getting together for happy hour...or what we thought was going to be happy hour. Little did we know that at the Friday's at the hotel it was 24 hour happy hour!!! You can't go wrong there which also determined our extended stay at Friday's. We were having a great time talking, having drinks, food, and getting to know each other. We said good night and were headed back to our rooms when we got stopped at a Black Jack table. I'm new to the game and they had a table set up for beginners and we couldn't pass it up. We had to wait just a few minutes until someone left the table for us to play but it was worth it. The dealers there are so nice and obviously willing to help you pay...I mean...Play :-) We actually ended up ahead so I told David we needed to stop so we had money to play with later. It was very late anyway and I was so tired!
We slept in on Saturday morning which worked out great. We were meeting up with the other couple again and they were having a slow morning also. We met up for what was supposed to be breakfast but by the time we actually met up it was lunch time. We headed over to New York New York and went to the ESPN Zone there. I didn't think the food was that good but we ended with a coupon for their arcade so David and I played games while Mark and Amber went and looked around at the shops. When we met up again Mark and Amber had a margarita in a Boot! We had to get one too! As we were walking in that direction I stopped at one of the gaming tables at a game called "Sic Bo". I had never heard of this game before and it looked really interesting and because I stopped, it caught the attention of David, Mark, and Amber. It is played with dice and the board was set up with the numerous possibilities that the dice could land on. This is what it looks like.

Basically, all you do is put your chips on what you "think" the combination of the 3 dice will land on. If you are right, then the spot will light up and you win. You can guess if it will be a high number or low number, if one of the dice will be a specific number, if the combination of 2 of them will be a specific roll, or what the total of the 3 will be. It looks complicated but it's not. It's easy, but the odds are clearly against you...just like any other gambling game...however, I won! Multiple times even. I won $70 off of playing with $2. Amber lost her money, Mark won $20, and David won $30. It was fun to play the guessing game!

We went and bought our tickets for the Zumanity show which is one of the Cirque de Soleil shows. We were going to the 10:30 showing and I was soooo excited!!! We continued to play tourist as we made it back to the hotel. We were going to meet up again at 8PM to have dinner and head to the show. We went to Friday's again since we knew it was the cheapest and easiest route to go. It was perfect! We headed over to New York New York again where the show was going to be playing. It was so AMAZING! It's the first Cirque de Soleil show I have ever seen and I was just blown away! the way these people move their bodies is just incredible! I LOVED it! I was so happy that it was something that we were able to do while I was there. Afterward, Mark and Amber headed to one of their clubs and David and I decided to play some games and relax instead. The loud music and dancing isn't really our scene. It was just a lovely evening all the way around. I couldn't have asked for a better night. I tried to play the Sic Bo game again but it had gotten popular so there were lots of people at the table. I learned how to play Roulette instead :-) I'm not a huge gambler and know how to stop when I'm ahead or to quit after spending $20. I won $40 and only had to play $5. Not bad :-)
We met up again with Mark and Amber and went straight back to the hotel. It was really, really late, and I was sooooo tired!!!
Sunday Morning I woke up and started to get ready to leave since I was flying home that evening. I let David sleep while I showered and got ready and re-packed. I was soooo sad that I had to go. We still had most of the day though and we definitely took advantage of that. We went back to the strip and started to wonder. We went to the Bellagio which of course was beautiful. Their Chinese New Year set up was just amazing! I couldn't even believe the flowers and plants that put together the whole thing. Totally in Aww! We walked outside in hopes to see the water show but it was too long to wait before it went off again. We decided that we would catch it on our way back. We crossed over the the Paris Hotel and decided to take the Eiffel Tower Tour Experience. That is a very HIGH elevator ride!! But it ended up being well worth the time. We made it up to the top just in time to see the Bellagio water show from the top of the Eiffel Tower! Again, we couldn't have planned that better if we tried! It was so great to see it from the top instead of just from the side of standing on the sidewalk. You could hear the music and see the show perfectly! Overall the view is beautiful from up there and you can see forever. We were up there for about 30-45 minutes and it started to get cold and windy. I was ready to get down! BRRRRRRRRR!!!! Luckily I had on a hoodie so at least I was able to stay warm a little bit.
We had lunch and then went shopping at the Miracle Mile Shops. We stopped at this art gallery and FELL IN LOVE with this new artist. His name is Chris De Rubeis and his art work is BEAUTIFUL!! If I had the money I would have walked out with art work for sure!! And surprisingly enough, it made David stop and stare as well. You can't even begin to tell how incredible they are by the pictures here but in person, they are just amazing! He uses aluminum as his canvas and uses auto paint to create his art. I wish I could afford multiple pieces!

We spent so much time in that gallery that we ended up having to head back to the hotel rather quickly to make it to the airport. I was sad to see the trip end. It was so nice to have such a relaxing, wonderful weekend.

An update....and a turtle photo

2009-02-04T20:12:00.001-08:00

There is nothing to report...there, you are updated! LIFE IS TOTALLY LAME! Actually, it's been productive as I have been looking for a job but I don't have one yet so it hasn't been as productive as I would have liked. People keep telling me that I have only been unemployed for a week and a half so I need to give it time. I don't HAVE time. I have received a couple of phone calls and interviews and I'm hoping that things come together. There is a job fair next week that I will be at if I don't get one of the jobs that I have interviewed for. One of the interviews was for a Director at preschool so I'm hoping for that one! I would LOVE it and I think I would be really good at it. When I think about it, I can see myself there, I just hope that they feel the same way. Put out good thoughts and prayers for me :-)
I will be out of town this weekend visiting my boyfriend who has been on business for two weeks...well, he's been gone one week and he still has one more to go so I get to go visit and I'm excited for that. It will be nice to see him and nice to have a couple of days not sitting in front of a computer submitting resumes and making phone calls. Finding a job is a full time job...if only it paid! I will be answering my phone though in hopes that I get a call for a job or another interview. I'm thinking positive!

My household is usually very unexciting because it's just me and my turtle, Goose. But this constitutes strange and exciting in my house. I just got him a new basking landing area and he has decided that THIS is a good idea! It's not, and he's actually sleeping...not escaping, but I don't like it! I have taken out some of the water in order to lower the basking area. He can still prop himself up now but at least he can't escape. Goose needs a bigger tank! It's on my list of things to do when I get a paycheck :-) But other than his new talent of an aspiring escape artist, isn't he cute?

Joining the world of Joblessness and Stress!

2009-01-29T09:38:00.000-08:00

I managed to work my ass off while going to school, being able to maintain a full time job and my sanity (sort of). I graduated from school and immediately started to look for a new job that I could actually make into a career. I was excited for this new opportunity. I had received a job interview, an offer, and a start date all within a week and I was so HAPPY! I was finally going to be able to work normal hours, have a salary that was livable, and health care! Things were falling into place. After completing all my paperwork for the new job I submitted my resignation letter to my current employer and said good bye to coworkers, clients, and kiddo's. It was sad to go but I was excited all at the same time. I spent the weekend volunteering and keeping me busy since I didn't have to prepare to do an overnight like I normally do and I was LOVING it! THEN...
Last Friday at 4:30PM I received a call from the VP of HR of my new found employer that they are required to resend all job offers until at least March. The job would be re posted when they are able to hire again and if I was still interested to resubmit my resume directly to HR so I could be "first pick". I was supposed to begin on MONDAY! I was DEVASTATED! Not only was I in a place that I could not totally freak out since I was volunteering but I was now without a job, without a paycheck. I was given a break a bit later got into my car, called my mom and just cried. I was at a total loss.
I was SOOOOOO Happy that I had stuff to do this weekend so it kept my head above water for at least a few more days. I did receive a call on Saturday from a place that I had submitted my resume to quite sometime ago so that was a blessing. I went to my interview yesterday so we shall see how that turns out. I have applied to 19 places over the past 3 days and am praying that something happens soon. I'm going to go apply for my substitute teaching certificate tomorrow and hope something comes from that too. I need something SOON!
I know that there are millions of people in my situation and are in worse situations. I am thankful that I don't have a family to care for and that this really only influences me. I can't imagine what those families are doing who have a spouse, children, animals, a home, etc, who are facing the same situation. It's devastating, scary, and real. I pray that everyone who is out there searching for a job that they may find something soon. Please pray for the same.

Graduation Pics

2009-01-04T23:34:00.000-08:00

HAPPY GRADUATION DAY TO ME!

This is one of my bestest friends, Kelly, who helped me every step of the way. Without her, this day probably wouldn't have come at all. She helped me get out of bed in the morning, kept me company at lunch, brought me coffee, and made me laugh. She helped me with homework and studying for tests. She was there for me when I was down and about to give up, celebrated completed tests and the last day of each semester, and understood exactly what I was feeling each step of the way. I am so thankful for Kelly. I love this woman!

Here is my Mom and my Grandma. They have been so encouraging and have never given up on me. My mom is my hero and without her example I would be totally lost in this world.

GO SUN DEVILS!

The Holidays

2009-01-03T23:52:00.000-08:00

When I figure out how to actually post pictures on here I will put some up from Graduation...if anyone (as most of you do) knows how to post pics on here if you could kindly help out the loser who has no idea it would be greatly appreciated :-)
After graduation I went to Texas for Christmas. I drove to Midland with my mom and celebrated with my Uncles, Aunts, my sister, my mom and my Grandma. I slept for more hours in my 4 days there than I think I did all year and loved every minute of it. There is something about G'ma's house that makes sleeping so easy. I don't know if it's the bed, the dark room, the smell, the safety, the fact that it's my Grandma's, but I slept soundly. We relaxed at home on Christmas day, completed a puzzle, watched TV, and had our Christmas dinner. We weren't actually celebrating our Christmas until the next day when my other Uncle and his family could join us. The next day we got up and began with a tribute to my Grandpa who had passed away earlier this year. He LOVED See's Candy and every year he was given a pound of See's Candy if not more than that. We did our tribute and opened a box of candy in honor and remembrance of my Grandpa. It definitely started out the day just right. We then had our Christmas lunch and then opened presents. It was fun to watch my cousins get excited about their gifts and get to know my Aunt Elaine who I haven't been able to spend any time with since she and my uncle got married. Afterwards, the girls went shopping and then came back home to work on a new puzzle (it's a family thing that we do at my Grandparents). When we got tired we went to bed and got up the next morning to start on the puzzle all over again. My uncle's went out to Chuck E Cheese with my cousins (who are 4 and 6) and the girls went out shopping to the mall. We came home and worked on the puzzle until it was time for dinner. We went down to the Country Club for dinner and it was just wonderful! I love the club and it has very special memories. Everything from the years at the pool and tennis lessons, golf cart rides through the course, or my uncle's wedding where I had wear the most annoying dress ever because it itched so bad, the memories are there. I remember breakfast buffet's on Sunday and practicing my proper etiquette when we would go there for brunch. It was just a perfect way to end the weekend. We had a delicious meal with delicious wine and we dined. My Grandma always tells us if we are just eating or if we are dining. Dining would imply taking our time and enjoying the company we were in. We only "ate" when we had somewhere to go afterwards. We returned home and tried to finish the puzzle but were not able to before I just had to go to bed. Mom and I were leaving the next morning and I had work that night we returned so I needed all the sleep I could get. I wish we could have finished it but there will be another year and another puzzle I am sure.
I spent New Year's eve with David and his family and went to bed early cause I'm a total loser who was working promptly at 6:30AM on New Year's Day. I made my New Year's resolutions and am prepared for the New Year. I think that it's my favorite holiday. Something about the new start makes it wonderful.
I hope that this year brings everyone the greatest of joys and accomplishments. I'm excited to see where this year takes me! HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

A SURVEY FOR 2008

2009-01-03T23:11:00.000-08:00

Stole this from another blog... looked like a good thing to do! I copied Kathy :-)

1. What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before? GRADUATE COLLEGE

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I DON'T REMEMBER THEM SO CLEARLY I DIDN'T I KEEP THEM. I'LL TRY BETTER THIS YEAR.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth? MANY OF MY FRIENDS DID AND THE GIRLS THAT I HAVE WORKED WITH AT THE GROUP HOME.
4. Did anyone close to you die? YES
5. What countries did you visit? STAYED IN THE USA
6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008? TIME FOR MYSELF
7. What date from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? DECEMBER 19TH. I GRADUATED AND IT WAS THE MOST INCREDIBLE DAY I HAVE EVER EARNED!
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? HAVE I MENTIONED GRADUATION?
9. What was your biggest failure? I DON'T THINK I HAVE ANY ALTHOUGH I SURE CAME CLOSE MULITPLE TIMES. IT WAS A ROUGH ROUGH ROUGH YEAR.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury? NOTHING SERIOUS.
11. What was the best thing you bought? I DON'T EVEN KNOW. I WAS TOO POOR TO PURCHASE MUCH SO THE FACT THAT THE BILLS GOT PAID WAS PRETTY DAMN IMPRESSIVE!
12. Whose behavior merited celebration? MY MOM FOR ONE. SHE IS THE MOST INCREDIBLE WOMAN AND WITHOUT HER I WOULD BE A LOST SOUL. AND MY FRIEND KELLY WHO WITHOUT HER I WOULD NEVER HAVE MADE IT THROUGH SCHOOL. SHE KEPT ME GOING WHEN I WANTED TO SLEEP, QUIT, OR DRINK :)
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and/or depressed? I WORKED IN CHILD AND FAMILY SERVICES AT THE BEGINNING OF THE YEAR AND SAW VERY VERY SAD THINGS. I WISH I COULD HAVE DONE MORE.
14. Where did most of your money go? BILLS
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? GRADUATION
16. What song will always remind you of 2008? THERE ARE SEVERAL: TIED TOGETHER WITH A SMILE: TAYLOR SWIFT, ONE STEP AT A TIME: JORDIN SPARKS, THE SONG REMEMBERS WHEN: TRISHA YEARWOOD...THERE ARE OTHERS THAT SIGNIFY IMPORTANCE AT SPECIFIC MOMENTS BUT THESE SEEMED TO BE ONES THAT CARRIED THROUGH THE YEAR
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:i. happier or sadder? thinner or fatter? HAPPIER AND THE SAME
18. What do you wish you'd done more of? TALK TO MY LONG DISTANCE FRIENDS.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of? WORKING. ALTHOUGH THAT WAS IMPOSSIBLE TO DO, I STILL WISH THAT THERE WAS A WAY TO HAVE WORKED LESS.
20. How will you be spending New Years? I SPENT IT WITH DAVID, WORKING, AND SLEEPING.
22. Did you fall in love in 2008? I SAY YES.
23. How many one-night stands? NONE TO SPEAK OF
24.What was your favorite TV program? DAYS OF OUR LIVES. IT IS MY TRUE GUILTY PLEASURE.
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? NOT HATE.
26. What was the best book you read? THE ONLY NON SCHOOL BOOK I RECALL READING IS "CHANGE OF HEART" BY JODI PICOULT. I LOVE ALL HER BOOKS AND WAS SOOOO HAPPY THAT SHE CAME OUT WITH A BOOK THIS YEAR. I WOULDN'T HAVE READ ANYTHING ELSE FOR PLEASURE OTHERWISE.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery? KATE VOEGELE AND NATASHA BEDDINGFIELD...IS THAT CONSIDERED A MUSICAL DISCOVERY?
28. What did you want and get? A COLLEGE DEGREE
29. What did you want and not get? TIME
30. What was your favourite film of this year? JUNO
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I TURNED 27 AND I WENT TO DINNER TO MY FAVORITE PLACE
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying. LANDING MY DREAM JOB
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008? COMFORTABLE
34. What kept you sane? KELLY AND THE LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? UH...NONE??
36. What political issue stirred you the most? HEALTH CARE AND THE MARRIAGE PROP
37. Who did you miss? MY LONG DISTANCE FRIENDS MORE THAN EVER
38. Who was the best new person you met? THERE ISN'T ANYONE THAT COMES TO MIND THAT MAKES IT ON THAT LIST. I WAS TOO BUSY TO MAKE NEW FRIENDS THAT WOULD ACTUALLY HIT THE TOP OF THAT LIST. I MET NEW PEOPLE, I HAVE HAD FUN WITH DIFFERENT PEOPLE, BUT THE PEOPLE I ALREADY HAD IN MY LIFE ARE THE ONES THAT HAVE REALLY MADE THIS YEAR GREAT.
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008. LOVE YOURSELF LIKE YOU LOVE YOUR FRIENDS, NEVER GIVE UP, CRYING IS OK.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year. WELL THE LYRIC THAT PROBABLY SUMS IT UP IS FROM "TIED TOGETHER WITH A SMILE"
hold on, baby you're losing it
the waters high, your jumping into it
and letting go and no one knows
that you cry, but you don't tell anyone
that you might not be the golden one
and your tied together with a smile
but your coming undone
I SPENT THE ENTIRE YEAR SMILING AND LAUGHING WITH OTHERS BUT I CRIED ALL THE TIME WHEN I WAS ALONE. IT WAS A ROUGH YEAR TO GET THROUGH AND PEOPLE WOULD TELL ME ALL THE TIME THAT THEY DON'T KNOW HOW I MANAGED IT ALL AND THEY COULD NEVER DO WHAT I DID. WHAT THEY DIDN'T KNOW IS THAT I CRIED IN MY CAR, I CRIED BEFORE I WENT TO BED, AND I CRIED WHEN I WOKE UP. I CRIED WHEN I WALKED TO CLASS AND I CRIED WHEN I GOT OUT OF CLASS. I CRIED AT WORK AND I CRIED AT HOME. IT WAS THE ONLY EMOTION I HAD LEFT. BUT NO ONE KNEW IT BECAUSE I SMILED AND I LAUGHED AND I ACTED AS THOUGH LIFE WAS A-OK. BUT IT TURNED OUT WONDERFUL AND I MADE IT. EVERYDAY WAS WORTH IT IN THE END.

IT'S OFFICIAL!

2008-12-22T02:52:00.000-08:00

I GRADUATED! I can't even believe it!!! I thought that Friday would never come and it did! I drove very carefully to ensure proper and SAFE arrival in severe fear that I would end up some tragic story about the girl who "Almost graduated" but got in a car accident instead. The day...the WEEK was perfect!! Finals ended on Tuesday and as I turned in my last final and walked to my car I didn't know if I should scream or cry so I did nothing. Of course, I had a massive breakdown as I was studying for my final so I guess the crying and screaming just came early. I left and promptly went to my friend Kelly's house in order to celebrate. We went to lunch and had a very wonderful meal and a drink to start off the week. Oddly enough, after that I ended up running some errands and doing laundry, not exactly the most exciting thing but a very necessary thing since I had a busy week ahead. On Tuesday night I was actually able to sleep since I took the night off of work which was needed because the rest of the week went a little something like this...
Wednesday morning I woke up and began getting ready for the day. It was early since I was meeting my friends Joyce and Luke for breakfast before I had to go to work. Very inconveniently I ended up with a flood in my bathroom and not enough towels to fix the problem. I ended up having to call my landlord and a plumber in order to get it fixed. This created a lack of shower situation and had to quickly make other plans. My mom was gracious enough to get up at 7AM in order for me to run over to her house and use her shower. The plan was get ready for the WHOLE day since I wouldn't have time later but that didn't happen. All I got was the shower before I had to rush home to meet my friends. We had to wait and hang out until the landlord and plumber showed up and then went to lunch (which was originally supposed to be breakfast). I was able to come home and get ready for the rest of the day since the bathroom was fixed (not necessarily dry, but fixed). I went to work and patiently waited for the time to pass which took FOREVER! My friends from Utah were coming into town and I couldn't WAIT to see them! Taylor got in first since he was driving down. We hung out for about an hour before we had to go pick up Stephen and Derek at the airport. We went straight to their hotel to check in and then spent time in their Bar and Grill which was really good. I LOVE those guys sooooo much! They mean the world to me and I was so blessed to be able to have them in town for this very special celebration. We laughed our asses off till we cried and told story after story of events that we have missed over the years of not living in the same place. We all used to be roommates too so we had plenty of stories to reminisce on. It was GREAT! We went back to my house so I could show it off and then I went to bed.
On Thursday morning I was able to sleep and then got up to begin my day. I was able to have lunch with my friend David and then headed to my mom's to pick up my Grandma and Sister from the airport. Conveniently my friends and family were staying at the same hotel (unplanned by the way!) so after we dropped off my family I just went to my friends room in order to dinner with them. Dinner was fantastic! Again, it could have been the company or the small amount of alcohol but we were having a blast either way! We walked around the mall for a little bit after dinner (the restaurant was just outside the mall) and then headed home since we had to be up early the next morning. Thursday night ended just perfect!
I wasn't able to sleep on Thursday night so I was up all night long (not anything that I haven't done before but probably something I shouldn't have done) When the time rolled around for me to get ready for graduation I did. The plan was to meet at Kelly's for breakfast and coffee and then go from there. We met, had a wonderful breakfast and went on our way. We did find it funny that after all our years of NOT eating breakfast it ended up being the last thing we did as students. I drove (like I said before, very, very carefully!) to ASU and found our place to be. The waiting felt like forever and it was a bit chilly outside. We were finally walking into the arena and it was a feeling I can't quite explain. WE WERE DONE! WE WERE DONE! WE WERE DONE! I walked across the stage, had my name called and if it weren't for pure excitement and lack of sleep I would have cried because WE WERE DONE! My mom was there to give me a hug at the bottom of the stage and the friends that I had traveled through school with were right there to celebrate as our names were called. After we sat down from there it was hard to wait. When the ceremony was all done I met with my friends and family to take pictures and plan the rest of the day. We went to lunch and had a wonderful, wonderful meal! Afterwards we all separated to do our own thing until the party. I was able to take a short nap to give the me energy I needed to keep going! Kelly and I had our party together and it was sooooooooo much fun! I can't even begin to explain it! It was perfect! We had food, drinks, games, and lots of people at the house. The perfect combination for a great party! The night ended and I was soooooooo sad to have it over. I had never felt so amazing! The night was more than what I could have asked for. The only downfall is that the next day was Saturday!
I got up and began the day with my friends from Utah for breakfast before having to take them to the airport. I tried VERY hard to convince them to stay but it didn't work. Clearly I wasn't a communication major of I should have been able to get them to not go home. I wanted them to stay so bad. I miss them so much and all the time. They made my entire week by being here. I am so thankful and so blessed to have them in my life. I was sooooooooo sad when I had to drop them off. I never wanted the week to end. After they were off, I had to get home and get ready for my evening with my mom, sister, and grandma. We went to this FABULOUS pizza restaurant that took 4 hours to get into...that's how good it was, not kidding! We were able to talk, enjoy our bottle of wine and have THE BEST pizza ever! By the time we were done with that I was EXHAUSTED! I was ready to get home and get some sleep. I slept so well and it felt great!!!
Sunday morning I got up and prepared for the day once again. I met my family for breakfast at this wonderful little place called Palette and I have never tasted breakfast that good before. I had Banana Rum Cake French Toast...made your mouth water now didn't I?! My mom always finds the little "hole in the wall" restaurants that are just perfect! Afterwards I spent the day Christmas shopping and spending time with friends just relaxing. Now I'm at work sooooooo tired but NOT complaining! Tomorrow (well, I guess technically today) I get to sleep like I have never slept before on a Monday since I don't have to be at the pool working my 2nd job. I think that my Monday overnight is going to be just fantastic since I will be well rested for the first time all semester. I CAN'T WAIT!

I don't know where or what I'm going to do from here but for now, I'm going to enjoy the fact that I can go to the gym when I want, grocery shop when I need to, read a book for fun, and SLEEP! For now, that's what I'm going to do. I'm so happy to have it all be over!

BRANDED

2008-11-26T00:30:00.000-08:00

It has been quite the week (and a while since I have posted anything). I don't actually know where my week ends and my week begins but either way...

I volunteer for a group called Branded: A movement against the sexual exploitation of children (http://brandedphx.com/). I'm learning alot and for the first time in a really long time I have felt completely drawn to something that I can't convince myself to leave. It would be so easy to walk away and shield myself, my heart, and my mind from the things that I have seen, the things that I have heard, and the things that I will inevitably come across. But turning away is exactly what we need to not do. It's selfish. The entire thing is incredible!
On Monday there was a court hearing that involved a young girl who had spent time on the streets, forced to do the things we can't imagine and shouldn't have to imagine. Unlike most girls who are in her situation she was taken off the streets, given a place to stay, people to protect her, and the chance to overcome the fear so she would give her pimps name and location so he could be prosecuted. This is not something that happens often because it takes on average 30 days for a girl to give this information and there just isn't the time and resources (YET!) for her to feel safe enough to relinquish that information.
So the day finally came for his sentencing and although I think that the death sentence would have been appropriate, the law states otherwise and justice was served: 18 years of hard time and 5 years of intense probation. It is exciting to see this process all the way through and to see that these people can be taken off the streets and to see that justice can be served.
I am proud to be involved with this group and can't wait to see the future work that can be done. I am impressed that this organization is supported and works together within the community and works with VICE (often times the first contact with these young girls) all the way to those of us sitting around a table brainstorming new ways and new ideas to education and protect.
This is only the success story of one girl. There are many more who are out there, waiting...

A day OFF!

2008-11-11T21:49:00.000-08:00

I have always been a fan of Veteran's Day and not just because that means that I don't have to go to school. Especially since I have been a "grown up", I have understood more and more the meaning of the day and why it is so important. I am so thankful to our troops and all that have ever served our country.
I would be lying however, if this particular Veteran's Day I said I wasn't very happy that I didn't have school! This semester has been so hard and so long and I was so excited that today I was allowed to sleep and relax.
My car has been broken and today was the perfect day to drop it off at the shop to get fixed. After dropping it off I was able to talk to my BFF Lacy who I haven't talked to in WEEKS since the cross country move away from me!!! It was a rather incoherent conversation as I was tired after my over night shift but I was so happy to hear her and talk for a bit. I can't wait till next week when we can actually talk and have a more in depth conversation. After that I had a wonderful breakfast of eggs and toast (a meal I rarely have) and then I was off to bed for a few hours. SLEEP on a TUESDAY! I was so excited I almost couldn't sleep! Wouldn't that have been a bummer?? I slept until the shop called me and told me my car was fixed and then I was up and in the shower (another gift on a Tuesday!) Showering on a Tuesday usually doesn't happen until 9PM if at all depending on if I was able to go to sleep at 4PM or 6PM (since I have to go to work at 10PM I have been known to skip the shower in order get a full 3 hours of sleep). After getting my car I made dinner with a friend which ended in a smokey kitchen due to burnt cheese but a delicious meal anyway. I played Tetris for a few hours with him until I had to go to work (in which I totally WON!).
It was a wonderful day and exactly what I needed. Of course now I am at work and waiting for the morning to come so I can go home and get more sleep but that is the true cycle of my life. Only 5 weeks left! Today was a true blessing in the semester!

What I thought was next, isn't.

2008-10-22T02:15:00.001-07:00

Well I don't need to tell you that I'M TIRED! That is a constant so let's talk about something new!
I just spent last Friday in California at a conference for Child Life Interns. The idea was to prepare for everything from interviews and resumes to the national exam for certification. I was really excited to go and desperately needed a night away more than anything. Luckily one of my best friends, Kelly, was able to go with me which helped very, very much! We stayed in some cheap dump of a hotel that allowed me to have the greatest night sleep I have had in a very long time. I don't know if it was just because it was night time or because the room was dark, or what it was but I slept like a baby on the hardest mattress I have ever slept on. I woke up in aches and pains from it but I didn't know the difference when my eyes were closed. After spending all day Friday at UC Irvine Medical Center I became more discouraged than I was going into the conference. I thought it was supposed to give me hope, answer questions, and give me confidence in what I wanted to do. Instead I came out of it with the realization that I may not be able to reach my goal after all. When I complete my current internship I would have to apply for the competitive internship...things I already knew! (but seriously, who has to do an internship before the internship?? Oh well...)What I didn't know is that what "competitive" really means is IMPOSSIBLE! In all the hospitals in the COUNTRY there are only about 50 opportunities for this internship and about 600 applicants. It would require me to move for sure (considering in Arizona there are only 2 spots open for the internship a YEAR!) That really isn't in my financial means but would be really exciting if I could afford to pay my bills here and live in another state for 4 months. More than anything it would be really neat if I could get ACCEPTED in the first place for one of the internships. Which much to my surprise it can take on average 3 years, and that's applying twice a year, to get accepted for one of the positions. As good as the conference was it was highly discouraging. So I came home and have pondered, "What should I do with the rest of my life?" all over again. People are pretty supportive by saying things like, "something will come up!" which doesn't actually help as much because I still have be looking for the "something" in order for it to come up in the first place. Luckily with my degree there are lots of options in the field, I just need to find out what I want to do. So I think that while I try and figure it out I will substitute teach. What do you think? The application process is pretty easy (once I graduate in December) and I don't know how long it will take or how often I will be asked to teach but it can't hurt to have it on hand. Who knows?!?!
I think that if I don't become a Child Life Specialist then I would really like to work for an adoption/foster care agency or run a children's shelter or something like that (you know, the total MONEY makers in human services...that was a joke by the way). But opportunities for that may not be readily available immediately following graduation. I will start applying to different places next month but I think that the substitute teaching will give me something to do that I would really enjoy while I'm searching for my new dream job. At this point, these are all just random thoughts and I may change my mind completely tomorrow but for now, it sounds good.
Anyway, now that I have talked about all the possible jobs I could end up with, I should probably focus on the job that I currently have. Time to check on the girls and see whose baby I hear.

I think I was tagged :-)

2008-09-27T21:51:00.000-07:00

Tag-aroonie

If Mallory didn't tag me then there is a different Jess B and therefore I blame my parefnts for naming me the same name as everyone else...but I'm doing the Tag anyway! :-)

My 8 obsessions.....8 things that I am passionate about...
1. My internship
2. My friends
3. Sleep
4. My mom
5. TiVo...DID YOU KNOW THAT I CAN WATCH MY TiVo PROGRAMS ON MY COMPUTER??? YIPEE!!
6. Sleep
7. Swimming
8. Sleep

8 words or phrases I use often...
1. seriously?
2. Whatever
3. Hello
4. 'I KNOW!'
5. Really?
6. I can't wait!
7. I'm SOOOO tired.
8. AHHHHHHHHHHHhhh!

8 things I want to do before I die...
1. Graduate
2. go on a cruise
3. get in shape
4. Have the career I have ALWAYS wanted
5. Travel the United States...why leave the country when I haven't seen everything here yet??
6. Have the fairy tale
7. Not worry about money
8. Buy a house

8 things I have learned from my past..
1. The Fairy tale is a lie but it sounds good
2. My mom was ALWAYS right
3. Trust yourself more than others
4. Friends are important
5. The sacrafice is worth it
6. Take time for yourself
7. Pretend
8. Ask questions

8 places I would love to go or see..
1. New York
2. Chicago
3. Seattle
4. Austin
5. North Carolina
6. Florida
7. Rhode Island
8. Hawaii

8 things I currently need or want...
1. Sleep
2. To take the trash out
3. Time to go by really really fast
4. Money
5. Sleep
6. Fast food to be diet food
7. Ice
8. Love

8 people i tag..
1. Lacy
2. Jody
3. Georgia
4. Mandy
5. Melissa
6. Rhea
7. Sherida
8. Jen

NO SLEEPING!

2008-09-24T00:24:00.000-07:00

I won't try and get any sympathy since I did this to myself but...I'M TIRED! The hardest day of my week is Tuesday. I sleep Monday's from 7AM-12:30PM then I'm up till Tuesday night at 6PM....that's right UP...as in AWAKE...as in NO SLEEPING! I'll do the quick math for you: 29.5 HOURS without night night time! Oh and to make it better - I sleep from 6PM-9PM on Tuesday (that's only 3 hours) and then I'm back at work at 10PM-7AM. Those are very precious 3 hours.
I'm aware, very aware, that this is the schedule I chose to some extent. With the pieces that I had presented to me between the job offers, school, and my internship, this is the best that I could come up with. Surprisingly I do very well on Tuesday's. I'm not the best company by Tuesday afternoon but I'm in class and I participate and I haven't fallen asleep in class yet. It's really the overnight on Tuesday that kills me. I tease my body with a few hours of sleep then I'm up for 9 more hours. I'll do okay till about 4AM and then I end up walking around till 5 just to keep myself up. Once the girls at the house and their babies are up I have a rush of energy. I'm all over the place in the morning so I have just enough energy to get me home before I crash for a few hours and then head to my other job.
Really, the point is...I'm tired! But only a 2.5 months of this and then I'm done!
Hope you're all having a wonderful night! Sleep well :-)

THREE months to go!

2008-09-21T11:36:00.000-07:00

My mom seems to be more on top of it than I am...I received a text message on Friday that said, 'ONLY 3 MONTHS LEFT!" Which means graduation is nearing! It can feel like time is standing still and moving so fast all at the same time. The weeks go by so fast but there are moments, even hours, when I think time forgot to move.
This next month is going to just go by so fast...or so I hope! I have lots going on...

Wednesday I apply for graduation :-)

Next Sunday I'm doing a day trip with my best friend Lacy. I'm so sad that her family is moving far, far away but I am happy for her all at the same time. I'm going to miss her and her little boys like crazy!!!!!!! But Sunday will be a Super Duper JLCC day-extended version and I'm so excited!!!

Then on October 16-17 I'm going to be headed to CA with my other best friend Kelly for a conference for Child Life Specialists and I'm totally excited for it! It's a short trip but I'll be with Kelly and the conference should be amazing! Lots of info and workshops that should help me get even further into my career.

Then there is my birthday the week after on the 24th. I have nothing exciting planned and I probably won't plan anything or do anything but I'm going to take the day off of my internship and do nothing! I think I deserve at least that.

The following week is Halloween but I hate that holiday so it's nothing special. I'll be at the hospital though doing my internship and they have lots of fun stuff planned for the kiddos so that will be fun. They get to dress up and do some trick or treating...although they trick and treat for toys usually and not candy...some kids can't have candy so it's only fair. But they say that the kids love it so I'm excited to help out with it.

As soon as that is all over it's time to look for jobs and apply. With graduation nearing it's the perfect time to see if I can land something fabulous before graduation...isn't that the goal? Mmmmm...should I stay here....or move?

So I have LOTS going on to keep me busy and on my toes. Hopefully it will just make things fly fly fly fly by!

Tada!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-08-25T00:12:00.000-07:00

It has been the most insane month ever!! Of course I say that and then there is always a crazier month right behind. I have spent the past month trying to get my life in order so that I can go into the semester as smoothly as possible. I think I have actually done it!
School starts for me on Tuesday! I can't believe that it's going to be my LAST FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL! I GRADUATE in December! I'm so excited!!! I can't believe that it is here. It has been quite the road to get here and I can actually see the light at the end of the tunnel. I didn't think it was there but I actually see it...or I'm dying...both a possibility but I'm going for the tunnel instead of death.
In order to financially make ends meet during the semester I have opted for 2 part time jobs. One of which is at a girls home for teen moms in which I do overnights and LOVE IT! I'm so lucky to have landed the job there for many many reasons but I just LOVE IT! The second one is at a swim school where I teach little ones how to swim and again, I LOVE IT! I love being in the water and the time goes by so fast!! I love the people I work with at both places and finally am in a position of what I consider "stress free" work. YEA for me!
I also start my internship for school this semester as well. I am going to be doing Child Life at one of the hospitals in their pediatric unit and I can't wait! I start this week but did my "how to" time last week and got to hold a little baby who had no one there with her :-( She was happy just be held and I didn't mind one bit. It is hard to think that it is one more thing I have to fit into the schedule but I'm anxious to do it and think that I will enjoy it very very much!
In addition to it all, school starts on Tuesday like I mentioned earlier. I'm lucky that I have been able to get a Tuesday/Thursday schedule but that means I'm there ALL DAY long. I'm SOOO excited to start though because that means the end is near.

Although there are many exciting things that are happening in my life right now my family did just experience a loss as well. My grandfather just passed away last week. Although it has been anticipated for a while it doesn't make it any easier. My grandpa was the most incredible man. I have some of the greatest memories of my life with him....golf cart rides, movies, Home Improvement episodes, feeding the ducks, "SHUT THE DOOR!", coffee and newspaper in the morning, Golden Corral trips, Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear...the list can go on forever! He led an a fascinating and fulfilling life for 94 years. He will be missed but is finally in a place of peace. There is comfort in that despite the sadness.

So there have been very exciting and very sad things but it has been busy. I'm ready for the semester to start and get into the routine of my life. I just wanted to give a quick post so you can keep up on what I've been up to!

Have a beautiful day!

"Call to make your appointment today!" Walkins only.

2008-08-02T16:47:00.001-07:00

GOOD NEWS, GOOD NEWS! I have been given a job offer! I'm SOOOOO excited. Not just because I really need a paycheck but because I'm excited to work where I will be working. When I learn all the details I will let you know but for now I can tell you that it's at a girls home that is set up for teen mom's and their babies. I will be working overnights 3 days a week and as much as I am NOT looking forward to that, I think I can make it. I still need another part time job so I'm working on making it all come together and hopefully it will...soon!
Anyway...so yesterday I go to complete paperwork and of course I have to go get a drug test, a TB test (for the 3rd time this week...no need to panic, I'm just in the middle of doing my health screening for my internship as well), and a physical. I leave the HR department and am looking at the map of health clinics that I am allowed to go to and trying to decide if I should go right then or procrastinate and wait till the morning (after all, I only have 24 hours to get this done). I figure out the one closest to me and start to head over there. I notice that it says, "CALL TO MAKE YOUR APPOINTMENT TODAY!" I think that is just fantastic cause I don't like waiting in health clinics at all! I call and ask to make an appointment and the conversation goes like this:

Health Clinic:"Thank you for calling Concentra how may I direct your call?"
Me: "I am calling to make an appointment for my preemployment health screening."
Health Clinic: "You don't need to make an appointment just come on in."
Me: "Can I make an appointment so I don't have to wait in line as long?"
Health Clinic: "No. We don't make appointments, we are a walk in only clinic."
Me: "Oh. Do you know what clinic does make appointments?"
Health Clinic: "None of them. We are only a walk in clinic. We do not take appointments. Emergencies get first priority."
Me: "Ok. How busy are you right now?"
Health Clinic: "We are really busy right now."
Me: "When is your least busiest time?"
Health Clinic: "We are always busy."
Me: "What are your hours?"
Health Clinic: "We are open 24 hours."

THOUGHTS IN MY HEAD: Really...you're open 24 hours and your totally BUSY ALL THE TIME? Maybe, but doubtful!

Me: "Ok. Thank you!"
Health Clinic: "Anything else I can help you with?
Me: "No. Thank you. Bye."
Health Clinic: "Bye"

So I drive over to the health clinic perplexed by the "Make an appointment" invite only to find out that you can't and when I get to learn that "BUSY" is only ONE other person in the clinic!!!! That's right only ONE! I was a little annoyed that she said that they were busy. She must have thought that I said, "HOW LAZY are you?" not "HOW BUSY are you?"

Anyway...I have now completed 3 TB tests, a full physical, a drug test, and have had to receive an MMR vaccine (NOT my idea of a good time!). I'm as healthy as a horse, drug free, and I don't have TB. GO ME!

I know you want to know!

2008-07-28T23:04:00.001-07:00

'Who in the world is Jessica?' may not have the same ring as, 'Where in the world is Carmen San Diego?' but go with it. I do not have pictures of small children to post or fancy photos from far away places. I'm single and stationary but still think that I lead a pretty exciting life...or at least that's what the voices tell me :-)

I recently left my job because of very different ethic and moral values shared between myself and my employer. I think that children should be taken out of a home when the mother wants her 6 year old to roll her cigarette or when a way to cope with anger is to pick up a knife and charge after someone else. I think that children should not be in a home where meals and snacks are optional instead of necessary or where the expense of alcohol or drugs are more important than buying a gallon of milk. And although the following is not a reason to take a child from a home I think that there should be books to read and toys to play with...you spent the money on an XBOX so you wouldn't have to be a parent so you can afford to buy THE CAT IN THE HAT for you child to read! But, the company I worked for seemed to think that this was not a problem or more importantly that this was not "our problem" yet we are working with a family where CPS is trying to figure out if the kids should stay in a safe, loving, foster home or return with their biological mother. To me, this was not only our problem, but our obligation to make sure that they are safe. Since we had different views on this I decided that I needed to find something else and could no longer work there. So, I'm on my new adventure of finding employment...which by the way, SUCKS but I have very high hopes and DO NOT regret my decision.

I also just finished my summer session of school so I have a few weeks before the fall semester starts and I will officially have my last first day of school!!! That's right, I'm DONE in December! It has been the longest road I think I have ever traveled and FINALLY I see just a glimpse of the light at the end of the tunnel. Not only will have my degree but for the first time I won't have to try and find full time employment that fits around a full time school schedule...and let me tell you, that is VERY hard to do! Although this semester I make things just a little bit more complicated by starting an internship (UNPAID) as well. Just one more thing to add the schedule as I search for a job. I am anxiously awaiting the semester and am not only looking forward to it because it's the beginning of the end but because I enjoy the routine of life when school is in session. I am tired, I'm worn out, I'm on the verge of crying almost everyday but I enjoy it. At the same time, I will be very happy when it is ALL over!

Now that you have been caught up on the events that aren't really eventful right now please come back soon! :-)